Let me introduce…

I’ll now do something I wanted to do for a while: a text to introduce myself. The girl behind this blog. Myself and not my illness. Because I am not my illness! 
So this is me, in a colorful mixture of pictures …
I am a 18 year old girl (young woman?) from Germany. My birthday is the 15th of july, I’m still in school, but only until june 2015, I’ll have my A-Levels by then. 

After I finished school I want to go to university to study social work (it’s called like that in Germany 😉 ) because I want to help the people nobody else wants to help, drugaddicts, homeless, immigrants and so on. 

I’ll move away for university, and I’ll move together with my boyfriend. He is the most important person in my life and he treats me like a princess. He is so polite and I really love him! We have been together for almost 7 months now, which might not sound very much, but we have already gone through a lot and he has always been very supportive!

I have a little dog, a chihauha, she’s called juna 🙂 actually she’s not my dog, but the ‘family-dog’, but I walk her very often because I love spending time outside, in nature. 🌿

Another very important part of my life is ballet: it’s my passion! I started at the age of 4, danced until I was 14, quitted and started again when I was 17 because I had missed it so much. I’m far away from being very good, it’s just my only hobby and it fascinates me. I do the best I can and I really love it! 🙂

I really love 50’s dresses and other vintage stuff 🙂 because I don’t have that much money left (bad me, I smoke) I don’t have so many dresses, but I have 2 that I really love! In future I want to have many more 😋 


One day I want to have kids. This is actually the main reason why I chose recovery. Maybe I want to move to sweden then, with my boyfriend, and raise them there, if it will be possible.

I’m christian. I’ve lost my connection to god due to the eatingdisorder, but I’m determined to find my way back to this source of healing & strength. 

So now you know a little more about the girl behind the lines 🙂 hope you enjoyed reading 🙂

Stay strong! 💕


23 thoughts on “Let me introduce…

  1. You are so beautiful, both inside and out:) cheesy but true. this post took tremendous courage, and I’m so proud of you! you’re right — we are not our illness. i hope to one day have the bravery to do what you did:) xoxox

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sorry. Before I didn’t have the time to answer you properly. 🙈 because yeah, as I said, I was speechless. I needed some time to think about what to answer you 😉 (yeah, My english isn’t bad but sometimes if I want to express a certain idea I have to think about it longer 🙈)
      Yes, I thought days about publishing something like that. I made a draft before, just to think about what I could write. I wasn’t sure wether I could do it, but On instagram there is this challenge #imnotmyillness and I liked the idea 🙂 but I never had the courage to really publish something like that. But yeah, today when I was walking the dog I thought about it again and I made a draft on my phone, just in time, after that the battery was empty. When I walked home, being completely offline I decided to publish. And that’s what you just read 🙂
      I am really thankful for every single of your comments all the time ❤ and I am sure that you can do this too! I didn't want to let the illness completely define me. I wanted to write down all the new things I discovered about myself, since the ED starts to fade. And I am sure I'll discover more. And you can do this too! Maybe only do it for yourself. Maybe don't have to publish it. Just if you like 🙂 (I WOULD LOVE TO READ IT ^_^ 😉)

      Liked by 1 person

  2. So great to get to know you more! I had no idea about a lot of things including that your from Germany…very cool! It’s beautiful there. And I love ballet too! I started when I was 3 and quit when I was 15 and regretted it ever since. Anyways, great post! Thanks for sharing 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Good for you! Yeah we definitely can’t let our eating disorders define us because it’s NOT who we are and they cause enough damage and chaos to our lives as it is. Glad you opened up-thought it was really cool and brave 😊

        Liked by 1 person

      1. Schreibe alles in ein Kommentar 😛 also, ich komme aus Österreich 😀 Nein, eigentlich nur Hobby und auch nicht sonderlich erfolgreich (hab mich übrigens vor einem Monat blöd verletzt auf der Bühne während meiner Theateraufführung wo ich ein Amateurballettsolo hatte 😛 ziemlich doof halt, aber bin ja schon auf dem Weg der Besserung 😀 ich atme Ballett! ich weiß alles drüber was man wissen kann. ich lese, kenne viele Tänzer und verfolge das Ballett, Opern und Theatergeschehen weltweit 😀 ich hab sogar Abi drüber gemacht 😛 tja, hoffnungsloser Ballettomane 😛

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Ich wohn zzt noch in der Schweiz (bin aber deutsche), gehe in Deutschland zur Schule ( noch knapp nen monat 🙊) wohne ja direkt an der grenze und werde danach auch weiter nach norden ziehn. Ich hab auch schon an vielen orten in Deutschland gewohnt also wo ich wiiirklich herkomme: ? ;P I dont care 😀

        Ein solo hatte ich leider nie *_* aber bei uns in der ballettschule kriegen die auch immer nur so 20 von 250 Leuten alle zwei Jahre 🙈 da muss man gut sein 😉

        Oh lala 😛 so extrem bin ich nicht drauf :’D (noch nicht…?) hatte ja 3 jahre pausiert aber es war halt schon immer so: musik an und ich sehe die schritte vor meinem inneren Auge;) und spüre sie in den Füßen 😉 hab schon als Kind getanzt bevor ich laufen konnte 🙂 im laufställchen konnte man sich ja festhalten 😀
        Ich liebe die Bewegung zur Musik und sobald ich mich auch nur ein 5-minütiges video von einem pas de deux oder so anschau bin ich woanders 😉 ich weiß nicht mal besonders viel übers ballett, bzw die tänzer, aber es ist meine fluchtmöglichkeit… Flucht vor der Realität… Ich glaube wenn ich den Lebenslauf von demjenigen den ich gerade tanzen sehe auswendig runter rattern könnte wäre schon mal ein bisschen was von dem Zauber gebrochen 😛
        Also ja… Ich liebe es einfach so sehr zu tanzen und tanzen zu sehen… Es ist eine andere Welt und sie ist so viel schöner…

        Liked by 1 person

      3. ja! bei videos geht es mir dann auch so 😀 im meinem Kopf tanze ich immer die ganze Zeit 😀 für mich ist es so bereichernd und unbezahlbar, dass es so eine schöne Kunstform gibt 😀 es macht mich einfach glücklicher 😀 das mit der Flucht verstehe ich auch gut! ist bei mir auch nicht anders. Kaum kann ich nicht in diese Welt flüchten, breche ich und fange an mich zu zerstören. es ist meine Realität, eine aus Musik, Bewegung und viel Gefühl!

        ich ziehe im Herbst wahrscheinlich nach Wien 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Wow, you are such an amazing beautiful person! Truley an inspiration to all! You seem like the perfect Social Worker, I know from one single comment on my blog you have already helped me. Keep it up and good lick with it all! xx A

    Liked by 1 person

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